Boris Johnson In Talks With Kim Jung-un To Open Up Post Brexit Trade Deals With North Korea

Boris Johnson is rumoured to be in talks with Kim Jung-un the despot leader of the secret closed off society known to the world as North Korea for possible post Brexit trade deals.

In a desperate attempt to find worthwhile deals to quieten down the anti-leave campaigners Boris Johnson is turning to countries who do little or no trading with other countries. Mainly those being run by hard handed dictators.

A Downing Street insider quoted Mr Johnson as saying “I can’t imagine North Korea turning down a trade deal on cheap weapons, surveillance equipment and torture implements,” to his trade minister.

North Korea is a closed country just ripe for a trade deal. We can become their biggest trade ally and chief importer worth several hundred thousands of pounds. 

Mr Johnson believes that a trade deal with North Korea could help put a dent in the £164 billion the UK used to earn in exports to our EU neighbours.

Also on Johnson’s list is Syria, Iran and Islamic State. Several rogue states have a long list of weapons including chemical weapons. Johnson sees a huge gap in the market which Britain can fill.

“Someone somewhere will buy our shit without needing to discuss and arrange deals over the next 10 years.” Said the prime minister at a secret cabinet meeting last week.

“Britain is moving forward with these possible trade deals and potential new allies. We are putting the Great back into Great Britain again.”

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